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Empower the ADD Child With Choices

Let your child make choices for themselves. Instead of
giving them a myriad of options, set out two and let them
choose between one and the other. 


ADHD children can’t concentrate on many things all at the same time. 
When you taper down choices, you are giving them the ability to make
decisions but you are not overwhelming them either.

Ditching The Guilt part 2

Sometimes you may wonder why you don't  have a nice, quiet child
instead of the livewire who never listens. But there are a
number of reasons why children  develop ADHD... none of which are your fault.



As I mentioned in an earlier blog post, your
parenting style can influence how you and your child deal with
ADHD. There is no one right way or one wrong way.

Dealing with a child who acts before she thinks things
through, loses and breaks things and forgets what you've said
30 seconds later can be frustrating and stressful.

 It can drive you to the point where you give up on discipline, and find
yourself being snappy, critical or even hating your child.

You need help to deal with the difficult behaviors and
accept that you're not perfect - and that what works for one
child might not work for yours.

Just as you might be dealing with some self-esteem
issues when it comes to your ADHD child, your kid is dealing
with the same issues in their own way.

Ditching The Guilt

Parenting the ADD Child is difficult enough without adding guilt to the mix.

Always keep in mind that you are not a bad parent in any
way shape or form just because your child has ADHD. As we’ve
said before, some people feel that ADHD is just a myth that
doesn’t truly exist.

 This simply isn’t true. ADHD is a medical condition with no one to blame. These
children are demanding and always on the go. That’s just the
way they are. It’s not your fault; it’s just the way they are
built.

Building Your ADD Child's Self-esteem

A child with ADD Often has a low self-esteem. Because they are more difficult and challenging to deal with, those around them tend to react in a negative manner toward them. Coupled with So how can you help your child with his or her self-esteem?


Praise and reward: you need to make your child feel
positive about himself or herself, so try and give praise
wherever possible. This can be for large or small actions -
for example if she's tried hard at school or has helped
clear up after a meal. As well as verbal praise, giving
small rewards can highlight accomplishments.

Building your ADD child's self-esteem Through Unconditional Love

 Love and trust are  vital ingredients if your child is to develop a healthy self-esteem.  


Don't attach conditions to your love. 
Your child needs to know you love her no matter how she
behaves. 

Tell your child she's special and let her know you
trust and respect her.

This will make all the difference in the world.

Building your ADD /ADHD Child's Self-esteem Through Sports and Hobbies

 Sports and hobbies: joining a club or having a hobby can

build self-esteem. Depending on your child's interests, the
activity could be swimming, dancing, martial arts, crafts
or cooking.

 No matter what the hobby, your child will gain
new skills to be proud of - and for you to praise.

Sometimes children with ADHD will go off their activity, so
be prepared to come up with new ideas.

For more ideas to help you to cope with your ADD child please take a look at 

Building Your ADD /ADHD Child's Self-esteem

 

Focus on the positive: get your child to write a list of
everything she likes about herself, such as her good
characteristics and things she can do. 

Stick it on her bedroom wall or in the kitchen, so she sees it every day.

Encourage your child to add to it regularly.


Helping your ADD Child to deal with criticism

Part of self-esteem has to do with criticism. You have to
teach your child the best way to deal with that criticism.
Tell them the following and then reinforce it:
1. Listen to what's being said. Don't interrupt to contradict
or make excuses.
2. Agree with it, where possible.
3. Ask questions if they are unsure about anything.
4. Admit mistakes and apologize.
5. Calmly disagree if it's unfair. For example, they can
politely say, 'I don't agree with you'.

Giving your ADD Child Constructive Criticism

There are times when criticism is necessary, but children
with low self-esteem aren't good at accepting criticism - or
giving it nicely. Most children with ADD /ADHD have had more than their fair share of criticism, most of it fairly destructive. Therefore you are going to have to exercise extreme caution with this child.


How you give criticism is important. Sarcastic, negative
comments can undo all your hard work to be encouraging. So is
there such a thing as good criticism?

If you want to teach your child how to accept criticism, you
need to give it in a constructive way.

Rather criticize the behavior you want to change instead of criticizing the person.


It also helps if you can find positive things to say to balance the
criticism. Using 'I' tends to be less aggressive than 'you'.

So if your child is struggling with a piece of school work,
rather than say 'you're stupid', say 'I loved the way you read the first
page. It's only a couple of words you're stumbling on.'


For more positive ways to love and live with the ADD or ADHD Child, please visit www.maximindpower.com today and claim your 2 free reports.

Focus on the positives instead of the negatives. Your child will be better
for it.

All these things apply when your child gives criticism as
well. For example, 'I like playing with you, but it's too cold to
play outside today.'

The idea is to learn techniques to cope with criticism, give
confidence and generally make your child feel better about
himself/herself.

For more practical examples and guidelines on giving constructive criticism to your child sign up for the Make Your ADD Child A Winner e-Course.

Dealing with the misbehavior that is part and parcel of ADD & ADHD.

All children behave badly from time to time, and
sometimes get aggressive, but it's more common for children
with ADHD to have problems with their behavior.


This is because the core symptoms of hyperactivity, impulsivity
and inattention all affect the way your child interacts.
If you look at how these symptoms can affect a child's
behavior, it's easy to see how they are linked to bad or
aggressive behavior.

1 Hyperactivity causes a child to fidget, run about
excessively, talk excessively and have difficulty in playing
quietly. It can cause your child to accidentally damage
others' belongings, play too roughly and hurt other
children.

2 Impulsivity causes a child to blurt out answers, speak
before thinking, interrupt, barge into games and have
volatile moods. It can result in your child having a short
fuse and to lash out when frustrated.

3 Inattention causes poor attention to detail and problems
with following instructions. A child with inattention
problems may not appear to listen to requests.

Could Your parenting style be making your child more prone to OCD - Oppositional Conduct Disorder

Dealing with the tough behaviors that children with ADHD can exhibit can push parenting and
teaching skills to the limit. 

This means children with ADHD
often receive a lot of negative feedback and critical comments.

It's thought that these negative parenting and relating
styles increase the likelihood of aggressive behavior that, if
unchecked, can lead to oppositional disorder or the more
severe conduct disorder.

 Children with ADHD are more likely to
have oppositional or conduct disorder than other children.

For the best parenting advice for your ADD Child see The Calm Kids Program 

The two most essential elements in disciplining the ADD / ADHD Child

Put simply, there are two parts to tackling any behavioral
problem:
1. Encouraging the behavior you want through rewards,
praise, or attention and
2. Reducing the behavior you don't with clear, consistent
rules and quick punishments.


Children with ADHD thrive on consistency and routines, so
to improve the chances of good behavior, let them keep to their
routine, such as getting up, eating or leaving for school at the
same time each day.

The most effective way of enforcing rules is to decide on
them together with your child - so agree in advance things such
as bedtimes, how long friends can come over and play for, etc.

Why punishment fails with the ADD /ADHD Child and what to do instead.

Bad behavior often decreases when it costs your child
something. 

The three main costs are:
  •  time, 
  • money 
  • and undesirable consequences such as briefly removing your child from an activity he/she enjoys.
The main reasons a punishment fails are:
  •  because it’s too severe, 
  • it’s given too late,
  •  or it’s inconsistent.

Some Simple Tips To Reduce Bad Behavior in Your ADD /ADHD Child

Where possible, make sure you give your child a good
reason for the behavior you want. For example, tidying up your
room will mean you'll find things more easily.


There are actually some very effective ways to reduce bad
behavior.
1 Get your child's attention. Address him/her by name and
speak clearly.
2 Keep commands short and simple.
3 Give quick punishments that can be enforced now.
It's not always possible to ignore bad behavior and focus
on the good. Instant, mild punishments - sometimes called
'negative consequences' - can reduce aggressive and angry
behavior.

The problem with punishing your ADD/ADHD Child for his "bad" behavior

Avoid punishments that have the potential to harm your
child either physically or psychologically. For example, keep
from insulting your child publicly.


Be careful not to reward bad behavior. For example,
items you buy after a tantrum on a shopping trip could be seen
as a reward. Keep consequences small and instant. It's
consistency that's effective - not severity. Monitor the effect of
the punishment. If it isn't changing behavior, it's time to try a
different tack.

When your child has calmed down and returned to his/her
normal self, talk to him/her and be clear about what was
wrong and what you'd like to see changed. You may be
tempted to ask 'why', but with younger children especially, it's
best to keep any analysis to a minimum. Often tantrums and
anger are your child's way of expressing things she can't put
into words.

For more discipline tactics for the ADD/ADHD Child, please go to 
www.maximindpower.com and claim your FREE Reports today.

Teaching the ADD child

Speaking from personal experience, this author can tell
you that having an ADHD child in the classroom can be one of
life’s most difficult situations. ADHD children require a lot of
attention and constant supervision to be kept on task.


When there are several other children that need your
attention as well, it’s not always possible to focus enough
attention on that one student who is disruptive even when you
know you need to do exactly that.

An ADHD student is amazingly disorganized with papers
and school supplies bursting out of his or her desk. They can’t
sit still unless you have them entranced in the lesson,and they
are constantly interrupting you while you are teaching.

There are times when it literally takes every ounce of
patience you can muster up not to yell at the little angel at the
top of your lungs. The upside is that these kids can often be
real joys as well. They can be good workers, very funny, and
are often extremely personable.

The structured school classroom setting can be a
tremendous challenge for individuals who have difficulty sitting
still, being quiet, and paying attention to the right thing.
One of the worst parts of trying to educate an ADHD child
is keeping him or her on task to make sure he or she doesn’t
fall behind. Often these kids will “hit a wall” during the school
year.

Every week they just get a little farther and farther
behind, until they're so far behind that it's impossible to catch
up. They lose their homework assignments, even after they
have spent hours working on them. And they study hard for
tests only to perform poorly the next day. They just slip farther
and farther behind with each passing week.

ADHD is most often recognized and referred for treatment
in third grade. This is when elementary school kids most often
hit the "academic wall."